Friday, October 14, 2011

It is time to begin...

I need to lose weight.  I need to find myself.  Are they related?  When I was younger I was thin and took it for granted.  I didn't need to work for it or earn it.  That is just was the way I was...then.  The problem is that as I aged and my confidence as an adult grew so did my dress size.  Now I feel like I am back to where I was 20 years ago.  Bigger, but still lacking.  Lacking what?  Lacking me.  Lacking my essence of who I can and should be.

I married young and did not finish my bachelor's degree.  I feel like a failure sometimes.  Then I look in the mirror and feel like a failure for my weight.  I need to focus on my positive parts...I try to be friendly, kind and helpful.  I want to be more than the weight of my parts.  Am I?  Can I be more?

This is the start of my journey.  I need to stop making excuses for myself and who I am and who I can become.  I need to fall in love with myself again.  I need to be worth the struggle for skinny.  Not vain skinny. After 16 years of marriage to a man I love and loves me...I am over vain skinny.  I want health.  I want to see my grandchildren (and enjoy them too!).  (Reminder to me: This isn't just about physical health.  I will at times review my emotional and intellectual health as well.)

I will start with small changes.  Three small changes.  Here they are: 
  • No eating after 8pm. 
  • From 2-6pm...only fruit and veggies for snacks (maybe nuts periodically).
  • Walk 30 minutes daily (minimum of 30 minutes).
I will review again in 2 weeks (roughly 10/29)

Be happy, be strong, stay on your way...to finding yourself.  <3

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